@BlondAmbitionTO: A guy said he fantasizes about me in a bathtub filled with Big Mac sauce and I said YOU'RE DISGUSTING AND DISTURBED and see you at 8, Brian.
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@Cheeseboy22: My son found a SEVEN leaf clover on the neighbor's back porch! I don't have the heart to tell him that it's really a marijuana leaf.
@kimmie_1980: I should start a wine company and name the bottles things like "don't be sad" "he's not worth it" "you deserve better"!
@Sassafrantz: When people stay in a horrific relationship instead of breaking up, I assume they killed someone together.
@pixelatedboat: Clinton fan: Emails? That's all you've got? Me: She sold the Saudis the jets that are massacring Yemenis Clinton fan: Emails? That's all you