@cleverprime: A hearty round of applause for Starbucks, please.
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@jazmasta: If you are unsure whether your kitten is male or female try this: - Tickle it - If HE laughs it's a male - If SHE laughs it's a female
@Karate_Horse: [loud speaker] "Hi shoppers I see a lot of confused guys with mustaches. we've moved the Hawaiian shirt section next to the pleated jorts"
@Kimgee8: Relationship status: the doorbell rings, my heart is pounding, it's the pizza delivery guy. Three-cheese, double toppings, thick crust.
@Chumpstring: GENIE: you have three wishes ME: make math go away GENIE: ha ok that one's on the house ME: oh so I still get three wishes? GENIE: huh?