@GlennyRodge: A horse walks into a bar. The batman asks "why the long..." "wait a minute, did you see that typo?" interrupts the horse.
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@ThugRaccoons: Wife: Why is the dog limping? Me: *uncomfortable pause* Wife: Well? Me: Uncomfortable paws?
@mrtruthandsoul: "Do you know why I pulled you over?" "You thought I'd like your pretty lights?" "Recite the alphabet backwards" "I can't even do that sober"
@Uniquicorn: *Joe Biden nibbles Obama's ear* - Please stop it *Joe whispers* Say it - No go away *angrily whispers* Say it! - ...please stop Biden my ear