@abbycohenwl: A kleptomaniac in a bakery really takes the cake
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@bharatunnithan: [Going to Starbucks for the first time] *Ok be calm and ask for a Tall Latte as practised* [a little later] 'Hi can I have Lall Tatte?'
@ArtConDee: Can you just bear with me for a moment? *grabs salmon out of stream. bites head off. hibernates.*
@david8hughes: Good cop: we found her body in the river Cop who doesn't want people knowing he can't swim: I was sick that day otherwise I'd have found it