@abbycohenwl: A kleptomaniac in a bakery really takes the cake
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@yassinovic89: Women's logic: I went to buy a suit. But i saw a beautiful pair of shoes. So i bought this handbag.
@jctwritesstuff: *has argument with husband* *brings up all the dumb shit he said in 2011* *adds "Historian" to bio*
@robfee: If I owned a pet store Id put a different rat in the turtle cage every night just to see if any of the turtles knew karate the next morning.