@OhNoSheTwitnt: A lot of your 30’s involves finding out that the bartender is younger than you and so is your doctor.
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@mrsjohngoodman: I ran over someone and now there's a bunch of flowers where it happened. It's like, I came back to apologize, not be lavished with gifts
@jdforshort: If sexual frustration could be transferred into a usable energy source, I would be sitting on a gold mine