@DJRotaryRachel: A miracle birth, then resurrection. Accept Frosty the Snowman as your personal savior.
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@ibid78: [internet] if u liked this story on cows dressed as plumbers.. [me] I did [i] here's a story on panda cops [barely containing my glee] go on
@ddrwg: [Riding a saddled turtle] BATTLE TORTOISE, GOOOO!! [turtle just goes normal speed for turtles] Aww man.
@SteveSuckington: [blind date] "I'm like, really good at *looks on hand* making the sex" -did you just read that off your hand? "Hey! You're not blind!"