@whostrevors: A moment of silence for the fat friend in a group of girls who can't jump high enough to be in the "mid air" beach picture :(
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@PaulyPeligroso: The cheese grader saw me walk in the house with a bag of shredded cheddar and shit got real awkward.
@treywafer: Dear white people: you stop Adam Sandler from making movies and we'll stop Eddie Murphy.
@notshivi: Everyone prepare yourself for National "How is it May already?" Day coming up tomorrow where people who don't know how calendars work tweet.