@Quartzjixler: A mother bear defending her cubs but it's me defending the fresh pan of bacon from other hotel guests at the breakfast buffet.
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@Ristolable: "Do you ever get the feeling Mitch is an undercover cop?" [MITCH enters] MITCH: Hey guys! *speaking into shirt collar* I brought the drugs
@grammar_c**t: Does anyone know the difference between an elk and a deer?nnCos I think I just ran over a cyclist.
@The_JRM: The reason my daughter wasn't nominated for an Oscar is because the Academy hasn't seen my 7yo trying to get out of going to school.