@badbanana: A national monument to those brave online heroes who were "First!" in comments.
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@10InchesPlus: "Is that a car alarm going off? Someone must be trying to steal it I better call the police!" - literally no one ever
@thesulk: My stomach just made the sound of a 68-year-old Long Island woman seeing her granddaughter for the first time.
@caperbc75: Do you think the guy responsible for squirting water in NFL players' mouths has "rehydration specialist" listed on his LinkedIn profile?
@awkwardphilippe: Confusing prank: Obtain a grizzly bear, name it Love then call 911 and say that Love is tearing you apart