@DumbPeoplePosts: A new breed of stupid...
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@inmynewskin: Let your girlfriend know how much you love her by screeching loudly like a pterodactyl whenever she talks.
@splegge: Raw eggs are great for a fitness diet. If you don't like the taste, just add sugar, flour, cocoa and baking powder and bake for 30 minutes.
@BradBroaddus: I don't always eat breakfast in my underwear but when I do, I get escorted out of Waffle House.
@AbbyHasIssues: I feel like whoever named it a "magic marker" was really overselling their product expectation-wise.