@juliussharpe: A new study shows dogs recognize pictures of their owners. Also, they're like, "Why are you showing me photos? I'm a dog."
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@RexHuppke: The emailer who threatened LA schools claims to be "a Muslim extremist." That's like a student signing his report card "Timmy's Dad."
@Dana_Bruno: Wasn't wearing my glasses at the park and bent down to pet some guy's gym bag. How's your night going?!
@BlindChow: [drunk w/ 2 kittens at a bar] give me another "haven't u had enough?" i'll tell u when i've had enough! *bartender hands me another kitten*
@chuchugoogoo: "Read 'em and weep" I say as I lay down my hand: a collection of my grandparent's handwritten love letters from WWII.