@NatasshaStash: A nice way to tell someone their breath stinks, "well I'm bored,let's go brush our teeth" in mid convo
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@SteveSuckington: [Shopping with teen son] *sees hot girl* *waits until she gets close* *grabs box of adult diapers* "How are you doing on Depends bud?"
@dafloydsta: [at Starbucks] ME: One large starbuck please. BARISTA: Sir, that's not even a- ME: Sorry, one venti starbuck please.