@NatasshaStash: A nice way to tell someone their breath stinks, "well I'm bored,let's go brush our teeth" in mid convo
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@thatUPSdude: Oh Subway You got busted lying about how big it is, no worries we've been doing that for years. Sincerely; Guys
@3sunzzz: This chicken is so moist, what is your secret? I squeeze a little KY Jelly into its cavity before heating.
@TheBoydP: Relationship status: Lucy holding the football for Charlie Brown to kick. She's Lucy. I'm the football.
@SomeChrisTweets: *ding* This is your captain speaking. We... Is this what my voice sounds like? Nobody told me! Haha, wow, weird. We're out of fuel.