@TEXASVETERAN: A person dies every 3 seconds. How can a person die that many times?
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@FlyJ_: [Gives husband a list for groceries] He brings home 1/2 of what's on the list and someone else's kid.
@Sickayduh: I tried to kill a spider by drowning it in douche and now it keeps picking fights with me on social media
@GrandadJFreeman: Most girls: "I hangout with guys, there's less drama." Me: "I hangout by myself. There's no drama & I don't have to wear pants."
@markleggett: If you accept small grammatical errors, decent society collapses and then everyone starts marrying dogs. That's what happened to Australia.