@UNTRESOR: A person running around with a laptop chasing an unsecured WiFi signal looks eerily like a cat chasing a laser pointer.
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@theguydf: Me: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: I don't drink. Me: Then can I just give you $7.50 to talk with me for a few minutes?
@GeriatricBeards: *throws coin in fountain* stranger: can you not do that? Me: just want my wish to come true S: this is a drinking fountain m: wish came true
@Dr_awfulpants: I think my eyes are playing tricks on me. *my eyes hide a whoopie cushion behind my skull*