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@FootballCliches: A quick visual guide to footballing pain.
@DonQuickoats: Hair so long she accidentally flushed herself down the toilet
@murrman5: we lost our power
a transformer blew up by our house
*eyes widen* "that's awes-"
it's not as cool as it sounds
@TheTweetOfGod: Is life fair? Short answer, no. Long answer, nooooooo.
@VodkaShorebird: A good way to help you determine who to weed out of your life is probably by how someone pronounces "coyote".
@panmidwest: How selfish am I? Circus peanuts and black licorice are my favorite candies just so I never have to share.