@FootballCliches: A quick visual guide to footballing pain.
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@CoopSoSarc: Walking out the door, my daughter tells me she can't wait to see Ariel with the crabs. Now I'm questioning which section I bought that DVD.
@FKACornshucks: This one time, a work colleague declared The Avengers to be a better film than The Dark Knight. That was a busy day in HR, I can tell you.
@drhappyknuckles: Doctor: Ted, you're dying, Patient: My name's not Ted. Doctor (checking clipboard): Linda, you're pregnant.