@undeadmolly: A reality show where gay marriage opponents have to live under 100% Biblical laws for six months so they can show us how awesome it is.
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@DaddyJew: IT:have you deleted your cookies? Me:yea the chocolate ones. There may be some raisin ones left IT:is there somebody else I could talk to?
@MrAdamBez: *gets sentenced to 25 years in prison* *opens twitter app* *looks up* *being released*
@Thedudish: It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a c**kroach move out. "Good luck," he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases.