@gavinpivott: A really hot girl asked me for my number today and all I had to do was hit her car with my car.
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@KatieKatCubs: My dad just called because he was thinking of me & loves me. And THAT'S why I never danced on a pole. Well, that and I got too dizzy.
@Contwixt: Good news: It works the other way around. I entered "internal bleeding" & "unconscious" in WebMD and it said I have a stuffy nose. Phew.
@shanethevein: Cop said that it's illegal for me to have flashing lights & siren on my car. I looked at his car and said are you going to arrest yourself?
@tchrquotes: thanks, but I'M TOO FAR AWAY FOR YOU TO BE HOLDING THE DOOR OPEN FOR ME WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS STOP IT