@fatherofcomedy: A recent study by UN has found dexter to be the no 1 cause for ocean pollution
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@thentherewasmo: Renee Zellweger is living proof that if you keep making that face it's going to be stuck that way forever
@withanewname: [flash mob in front of me & my girl] [I join in then kneel down gasping] "Will you.." "YES!... YE.." "grab me a smoothie from Jamba Juice?"
@coketruck76: Me: I'm into fitness Trainer: not again M: fitness whole pizza in my mouth T: you should go M: this isn't going to "workout" T: LEAVE NOW