@birbigs: A shake for breakfast. A shake for lunch. A sensible dinner. SEVENTY FIVE COOKIES AT 12:34AM
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@shatterpants: If Kung Fu Panda taught me anything, it's that obese people can be accepted...so long as they know kung fu.
@Smooheed: Stop screaming! I thought you'd appreciate having someone to pass you a towel when you got out of the shower
@AndyAsAdjective: 20YR OLD ME: awww yeah! a new car! 30YR OLD ME: aww yeah! a new Xbox 360! 40YR OLD ME: aw yeah! a new shower curtain with a mildew-resistant liner!
@CopBroughtPizza: "even if my client did kill his wife, think of the 7.4 billion people he DIDN'T kill." - my first and last day as a defense attorney