@PaperWash: A single text to my mom is like pulling that loose thread on a sweater.
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@GodShammGod9: My great grandma started to giggle at a barbecue and when I asked what's funny she said " everyone here is alive because I got laid ".
@HiddleDeeDee: Just cleaned out my desk. Bad news: I apparently have 1,453 Sharpies and none of them are sharp. Good news: I found the plane!
@NintenDom: My favourite part about playing video games is probably thwarting evil. You never get to thwart anything in real life. I like to thwart.