@bourgeoisalien: A skinny friend told me she's never hungry and just 'forgets to eat', so I drove her out to the woods and left her for dead. Is that wrong?
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@internetluke: "Your under arrest!" No, YOU'RE under arrest *police looks around points to himself & mouths 'me'* Yeah you. *he tosses me cop car keys*
@b0dymassage: "HELP!" Joe pants. "WHAT IS IT JOE?" I belt. "I THINK SOMEBODY SWITCHED OUR ARTICULATORY VERBS WITH CLOTHING WORDS." He cardigans.
@FrogAvalanche: News Anchor: Our correspondent at the scene had this to say. *cut to correspondent* Correspondent: This.