@RdrJay47: A social gathering without food is called a "Don't."
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@dril: glorious crime spree after being fired from wal mart., expertly hopping fences, chugging all the seeds out of my neighbors bird feeders,
@NikiWithIssues: I went for a run today. What the hell is wrong with you people why would you do this to yourself you need help.
@BerrryDLite: Coworker: My arms are killing me from hoeing in my garden this weekend. Me: Thanks but I'd rather not hear about your sex life.
@AGStr8upNinja: If only people were named after their tattoo's. This guy standing in front of me in Petro Canada Would be named Machine gun-Snake-Jesus.