@girl_a_whirl: A spider crawled on my son's hand today. I did what any father would do. I mean, Luke Skywalker seems like a productive member of society.
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@Book_Krazy: *pulls up to window* Me: *on phone* Ok, so you want a chocolate shake also? Ok, I'll get two then. *phone rings while its at my ear*
@hoedeehoe: (1st day in heaven) Me: Whoa- is that Elvis? Angel- no, it's an impersonator M: Wow, is that... A: listen man all we got is impersonators
@BuckyIsotope: *jumps out of plane* *begins reading parachute instruction manual* STEP 1: PUT ON PARACHUTE *looks up* Well hell