@Steelers1972: A spider just fell from the ceiling and landed right in front of me and now I have to explain why a woman was screaming in my cubicle.
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@RollAroundSue: 7: Its the last week of school so we don't have to go. Can I stay home? Me: Ha! Nice try, kid. Teacher: Its true. Me: Ha! NICE TRY, TEACHER.
@TheTweetOfGod: Everyone in "Star Wars". Everyone in "The Muppets". Everyone in "Game of Thrones". This is now the first tweet with over 140 characters.
@Barknado69: Friend: just make small talk *later, on date* Me: so...grains of sand Her: uh yea- Me: dwarves Her: are u okay- Me: bottle caps