@omgthatspunny: A squirrel needs about two pounds of acorns a week to survive. That's nuts!
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@BigHeb7: My wife takes 13 bikinis for a 4-day beach trip. Meanwhile, I'm rocking the swimming trunks my mom bought at K-Mart in 1991.
@SortaBad: "I can't wait to see what my Happy Meal prize is! Wait...what the -" [U2 is playing a free concert in the box]