@bingowings14: If experience has taught me anything, I've forgotten what it was.

@JessObsess: Every time I cook risotto I feel like Gordon Ramsey is going to walk in and scream at me.

@dlockw21: Name dog. Call dog every derivative of that name but the actual name.

@ChristianPlante: Your perfume/cologne should reward someone for getting close, not punish them for being in the same building.

@itsthatAsh: Commas are the coolest punctuation, because they're like "Yeah, you haven't got time to stop, but you can chill for a little bit."