@ClearlyUnwell: A wise man once said nothing.
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@PinkCamoTO: Me: I got my first TOTD! It's exciting! Him: What's that? M: um, well, it's an imaginary trophy... H: well then I'm imaginary proud of you.
@slimmy_shady: Tom Cruise has signed on for Mission Impossible V. His impossible mission is trying not to show up on everyone's gaydar.
@AaronFullerton: Doctor: "I'm sorry, sir, but you have an STD. I suggest you make a list of all your partners--" Lou Bega: "Way ahead of you."