@Kimpulses: A woman was arrested when her boyfriend’s body was found in a freezer in their living room. Who the hell puts a freezer in the living room?
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@jessforaminute: *Drops French fry in the crevice of car seat* Join your brothers and sisters sweet child
@Lisabug74: If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and barks like a pig, then I probably took too many pills.
@MarfSalvador: [Funeral] Her: [Through tears] I'm gonna need your support today Him: You got it babe [waves flag and presses air horn] WIFE! WIFE! WIFE!