@AmishPornStar1: Abs are for people who can't afford good food.
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@jeffswarens: If you stare at a 6 year old when they're eating a banana split, they hold it real close and eat faster.
@LoveNLunchmeat: Yesterday my daughter asked how babies are made, and I gave such a terrible explanation she now thinks babies come from eggs.
@ericsshadow: 1 in 5 bosses will let you leave work early if you claim to have 'lady problems' then start crying. It works even better for guys.