@4handfuls: AC changed "laughing at your gif" to "laughing at your God" and now I've accidentally started a religious war in this group text...
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@ObviouslyJustMe: Jesus said to Peter, "Come forth and I will give you eternal glory." Peter came fifth and won a toaster.
@lazerdoov: My girlfriend told me she's "spotting" and I'm like yeah right for who? You can't even bench 50 Lbs lol
@ArfMeasures: Flight attendant: Is anyone on board a doctor? Me: No, I'm on board a plane haha Man having a heart attack: ok I'm ready to die now