@simoncholland: Accidentally feng shui'd tonight when everybody wang chunged and I've never been more embarrassed. That lamp does look great there though.
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@SkinnerSteven: 🎶 I'm a cat, boy / in a sealed box I hide / I'm Wanted / dead and alive! - Bon Schröedi
@LackOfShame: *Goes to bathroom *Reaches down to unzip *Discovers pants have been unzipped for the last 4 hours *Starts wearing underwear
@DwayneDavidPaul: Pooping on the clock is the small-scale revolt of the working class in preparation for the people's revolution.