@punmagnate: Accidentally made eye contact w/co-worker thru bathroom stall door crack. Didn't know what to do so I blew him a kiss
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@panmidwest: How selfish am I? Circus peanuts and black licorice are my favorite candies just so I never have to share.
@susie_meister: If we eliminated, "Is your car running ok?" from our conversations, my dad and I would never speak.
@Mikestanley1: [pulls up after first date] Me: well, this is my place Her: a bouncy house? Me: you expected a bouncy castle? IM SORRY "YOUR MAJESTY."
@LeahsLounge: If you love something, set it free... Except if 'It' is a man. Because he'll get lost, and won't ask for directions.