@DomesticGoddss: Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I'm the proud owner of aisle 7.
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@GerryDuggan: Stay through the end of Hansel & Gretel to see Nick Fury kick Jeremy Renner out of The Avengers.
@ArfMeasures: DATE [annoyed] in your profile, it said u had amazing abs ME [slams car to a stop] Amy it's the best anti-lock braking system I've ever had
@OBiiieeee: Cop: where ya headed? "the gym" Cop: im gonna save you a lot of embarrassment and arrest you "thank you so much, officer"