@envydatropic: According to all these "note to self" sticky notes I am a very forgetful person also I have no idea what these notes mean
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@Jake_Vig: No, no, no, you don't have to engage in a long explanation of why you're single. We've spent five minutes together, I think I've got it.
@WhatsHerFace33: "Operator, run this licence plate please Echo Alpha Tango Alpha Delta India Charlie Kilo" - Me, if I was a cop on the day I got fired.
@Bnowaygirl: I think Titanic is fake because, how do they record it when they are all dieing in the water?
@AndyAsAdjective: [spelling bee] your word is 'hor d'oeuvre' "can you use it in a sentence?" yes…'I bet this kid can't spell hor d'oeuvre'