@bazecraze: According to hotel AC, the difference between 72 degrees and 73 degrees is 40 degrees.
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@perlapell: My midwife just sat me down and gently broke the news that I am simply plump and she has no reason to be here.
@imskytrash: cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice
@eudaimonium: Those who carry teensy cute purses shouldn't throw stones at those who wear cargo shorts, because I can carry more stones.
@tacsanitchiban: My daughter ruined her Halloween costume. Gonna wrap her in aluminum foil and send her out as a leftover.