@bazecraze: According to hotel AC, the difference between 72 degrees and 73 degrees is 40 degrees.
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@LittleMissZesty: So when a cat pounces on a stranger's lap and demands tickles it's "cute" but when I do it I'm "causing trouble in Starbucks" again. Jeez!
@Bownuggets: Accidentally dropped a magic mushroom in my cats litter box & now he's laying across the driveway staring at the stars & quoting Kierkegaard
@RobertManchild: [company meeting] Manager: $5000 in office supplies have gone missing. We are making some changes. Me: [in paper clip chainmail, sweating]