@LOsepyan: According to my next door neighbor's diary I have "boundary issues" can you believe that?
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@Lisa_Laughs_: Me: I can't work today. Boss: Why? M: My grandma died. B: Our grandmas died 20 yrs ago. M: ... -Why working for your brother is a bad idea.
@SteveKoehler22: Women love to say "sexy AF" or "hot AF" on Twitter .... If I'd known being in the Air Force was that hot...I'd have stayed in !
@weinerdog4life: If everyone would stop screaming, I'm sure we'd all agree I'm not supposed to be in this women's restroom.
@osigat: <- I've been drinking for almost 6 hours. If you see something wash up on shore that looks like this, please identify me.