@mydmac: According to the law it's not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership.
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@myonlymizztake: One of my coworkers keeps stealing my lunch, so I included my favorite cucumber today. Hope she likes it.
@iRowlf: I'm sorry that I gave your baby a wine cooler. I forgot that I superglued a mustache on him earlier and thought he was of legal age.
@Smug_Lemur: Arguing w him is like playing Pictionary w/ the person who draws one weird little shape and just keeps circling it over and over and over.