@DaddyJew: According to this box of spaghetti I am an Italian family of 8
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@Zombie_Kit: Cats are so lucky. Nobody thinks twice when they run from company and hide under the bed. I do it and its "weird".
@TheAlexNevil: Me (to 7): Son, we... Wife (in earpiece): have to talk M: Have to talk W: about girls M: About grills W: NO M: NO W: IDIOT M: IDIOT
@bourgeoisalien: Just accidentally messaged my husband "love you sexy beats" instead of "sexy beast" and now he thinks he’s some sort of DJ.
@yobrah_: So if you want to be sure your internet history is deleted, just whisper 'please delete my internet history' into any hole on the computer