@Cpin42: According to Verizon, the cable guy should be here sometime between 10:00 a.m. and the return of Christ.
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@pmann555: They say it's not the destination, it's the journey.........Except when you're heading to the bathroom with diarrhea...
@pleatedjeans: I should've never taught my parrot to say the alphabet backwards now he drives drunk all the time the cops can't do shit it's a real problem
@LorieGZ: Getting a snowstorm today. They said it would start around noon, it's now 12:02, so already the meteorologists were wrong.
@ArfMeasures: "My friend got me a Fitbit" ME: Oh yeh, heard of them, haven't got one tho "u can buy them online" ME [whispering] u can buy friends online?