@envydatropic: According to WebMD, people are Sick & Tired of me
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@better_off_dad: Life is like a Rubik's Cube It may look like a jumbled mess at first, but in the end it will make you want to beat the shit out of someone.
@thejessbess: I always wear running shoes while driving because you won't know what the terrain will be like until after the cop pulls you over.
@girlontapas: I do things for others... Like when I'm drunk dancing by myself, Billy Idol style, and I save my friends from being seen with me.