@Blue_Crab: ADHD is ADD in high definition.
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@Tmoney68: As the fridge door was about to shut, I grabbed pizza & barely got my arm out before it closed. *Legally changes name to Indiana Jones*
@ericsshadow: [answers phone during job interview] What's the address here? The Pizza Hut guy can't find me.
@eddiesteadyno: Making reservations for one at a fancy restaurant because every now and then, I like to be wined and dined before I take advantage of myself
@AaronFullerton: Wife: Nothing you could say could convince me that cockroaches aren't the worst. Me: Wall-E's friend was a cockroach. Wife: Except that.