@Elizasoul80: Admitting you have a problem is half the battle. Convincing everyone else that they're the problem is the other half.
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@donni: Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, though, it's every man for himself
@buckweiser13: I've been driving with a coca cola can stuck in snow on the roof of my car for a week cuz 7 thinks it makes us cops. Stare all you want.
@ineedaballrub: I just Googled 'Nicolas Cage jokes' and it showed me a list of every film he's been in. Well played, Google.
@Sickayduh: [Touring Italy] Guide: Bathroom anyone? Me: I peed at the Tower of Pizza Guide: That's Pisa Me: Sorry. I took a pisa at the Tower of Pizza