@AntozWolf: Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all the dogs that are excited for the car ride until we realize where we're going.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@murrman5: *holds up 2 ties* which one, I have a big meeting today "both are nice" [wife calls later] "how'd it go" well, wearing 2 ties was a disaster
@MatCro: I'll never forget my grandad's last words on his deathbed. He said: "I should never have bought this deathbed. Asking for trouble..."
@possibilyss: In hindsight, i shouldn't have said 'surprise me' when the judge was about to sentence me