@HallpassCanada: Adults with big round heads have kids with big round heads so for god sakes please try to date outside your head shape.
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@Stuccoman1: The way my dog maintains eye contact while taking a dump is unsettling. Can't he read a magazine like a normal dog?
@Fred_Delicious: [Describing guy who just mugged me to sketch artist] "He was literally kermit the frog"
@TheRealRHB: Hey Alaska wilderness show person who is about to freeze to death with no hope in sight, maybe just cuddle up with the crew filming you...