@imshitimsorry: aesop: man what you did was not cool. like imagine if a fox did what you did to me, and i was a goose. that makes it much clearer right?
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@tastefactory: BEN CARSON: On the news I saw a portal to another dimension open & robots came out, we need to stop that MODERATOR:That was The Avengers sir
@_ElvishPresley_: If you watch Benjamin Buttons backwards it’s very confusing bc you can’t understand what people are saying
@thatdutchperson: [blind date] Her: so what do you do for fu.. Me: I'M 34 IF YOU DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH ME I'M STATISTICALLY UNLIKELY TO EVER FIND A MATE