@withanewname: After a failed college project to fight hunger, Clark decided to focus on fighting crime and thereby dropping a p from Supperman.
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@WilliamAder: People keep talking about the new Star Wars trailer. In my day, Star Wars had SPACESHIPS!
@Fred_Delicious: BREAKING: Pot calls kettle "black". "Racial tension at boiling point" says mayor of kitchen cupboard
@gwatts77: Judging by how all of these ladies tweet about cucumbers I'm pretty sure size does matter because I never see them tweeting about carrots :(
@hot_coughy: When a woman says "I can't even tell you how upset I am right now" just wait 3 seconds.