@ClaytonSykes: After buying toilet paper at Walgreens, the cashier said, "you'll need your receipt." I don't think I've ever been this scared in my life...
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@PeaceInTruth1: I've never watched CSI because I learned everything I need to know about solving crimes from watching Scooby Doo.
@TheCiscoKidder: Me: It'll just make mom grumpy, so don't tell her that the dishwa..... 4 year old: MOM! DISHWASHER'S BROKEN!
@Brampersandon_: *zips up tent* [Wife]: What happened [Me,scratched up & clothes ripped]: I was uh.. *flashback to me being chased by a bee* wrestling a bear