@SortaBad: After I drink coffee I show my empty mug to the IT guy and tell him I've successfully installed Java. He hates me.
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@aka_fatman: Let's play the Rihanna drinking game! We'll drink a shot of vodka every time she says 'work'. [2 minutes later] *house is on fire*
@hippieswordfish: HEAD OF THE NATIONAL WEATHER SEVICE: so how will we name all these hurricanes? GARY, WHOS BEEN DIVORCED 31 TIMES: i have an idea
@Rick_IZ: People who lick their fingers then page through the papers on the printer Just throw it out. I'll print it again.