@sagarcasm: After Samsung phones, now Samsung washing machines are exploding. Samsung is now the third biggest nuclear power after US and Russia.
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@TheDjinnTrials: Well excuse me all to hell. I thought you'd be flattered with a mosaic of pictures of you at the gym. No, you don't need to call the police.
@DropsNoPanties: Barista: Did you hear Netflix is raising its price $2 a month? Me: Ridiculous! I won't pay it! B: here's your coffee. $12.32 M: thank you
@weinerdog4life: Note to self: Take Mila Kunis picture off of vacuum before taking it in for service next time.