@TylerLinkin: After sex, I take the condom off and make a balloon animal for the lady.
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@bea_ker: [circus school] "So to tame the lion, you have this whip..." What if the lion's too close? [picking up tiny stool] "we've thought of that"
@Black__Elvis: If I were a woman I’d probably use tampons because it seems like it would be hard to stuff a maxi pad all the way up there.
@AristotlesNZ: If the fate of the world ever depended on me opening a new plastic grocery or produce bag in under a minute, we'd all be dead.